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Loida Casares Ruiz

Wife, Mother, Writer, Advertising Manager

Loida Casares Ruiz grew up in Northeast Houston. She graduated from the University of Houston with a Bachelor of Arts in Journalism and Minor in English. She received a Master of Arts in Communication in 2001. She works in advertising by day and is a mother, wife, and writer by night. She has al...

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Just a Little Bit of Perspective

Loida Casares Ruiz

The other day I heard some really sad news and my co-worker and I started talking about it and how people react to negative news. We also talked about people who are afraid of confrontation and shy away from bad news. She said something that really struck a chord in me. “I think that once you’ve had cancer you’re not scared of anything.”

I turned and looked at her. I had no idea she is a cancer survivor.

“What kind of cancer?” I asked.

“Breast cancer,” she answered.

“Wow!”

I was amazed. I was amazed at her strength and I could understand it. I knew where it came from.

I’m often reminded by my husband not to sweat the small stuff. He calls me, “Ye of little faith,” or something to that effect.

I know he’s right. I know that faith is intertwined with what my co-worker was talking about.

I told her about a co-worker I had when I was young, in my very early twenties, when I entered the work force. I would get so stressed out about things, about missing a deadline and not being able to get an advertiser’s ad in and things like that. Of course I was a big ol’drama queen even back then. And my co-worker told me, “Loida, don’t stress out over this. It’s just a job, it’s not cancer.” Maybe he already knew something in his late twenties that I didn’t know yet.

When my sister was diagnosed with cancer two years later I knew what he meant. All of a sudden I was questioning my life, my existence, and my choices. I felt like I had sold out to the system when I had decided to change my major from straight Journalism to Journalism with an emphasis in Advertising. I was going to be a writer, a journalist and then suddenly I was working in advertising.

I quit my job to write and to teach. I took off to Spain with a group of girlfriends, penniless, for a whole month during the summer. I only lasted four years, but it was a learning experience. I ended right back in Corporate America after the teaching and working for a university.

Suddenly I was now married, having my first baby, finishing my Master’s, buying a house, and having my teenage step-daughter come to live with us. I even went through the death of my mother in between going back to Corporate America and having my daughter.

But somehow I forgot. I forgot that it’s not cancer. I forgot that there are much much worse things in life than the little things that annoy us, frighten us, or make us upset.

My husband tries to remind me of that and how faith plays a big part in it, but yet I still forget. I have to be reminded again, like I was the other day by my co-worker. I have to put it all into perspective.

I look at my house today and it’s a mess. We had a busy week. Meetings at school, for our religion, Walking with the Dinosaurs, and yesterday I made myself go to the gym. I haven’t had time to pick up, to clean or to wash dishes. The laundry is piling up. Then today we have a house warming party and a surprise party to attend. I can’t possibly get through everything that needs to get done. I start to feel stressed. Then I remember, “It’s  not cancer.”  Perspective. We just need to get a little bit of perspective sometimes.