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Loida Casares Ruiz

Wife, Mother, Writer, Advertising Manager

Loida Casares Ruiz grew up in Northeast Houston. She graduated from the University of Houston with a Bachelor of Arts in Journalism and Minor in English. She received a Master of Arts in Communication in 2001. She works in advertising by day and is a mother, wife, and writer by night. She has al...

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Detours

Loida Casares Ruiz

I am a TO DO list kind of person. I always make a “to do” list. Even when I’m just here at home and I need to get some things done is a short period of time, I will write out a To Do list real quick to check off as I go along.

I used to do the same thing with my life. I was going through some old journals from my teen years and I came across a list entitled, “Things I Will Never Do.”  It was an interesting list that had some things like, “I will never get married young” and “I will never move out of the house completely, until I’m married.” The “completely” clause was placed in there on purpose in case I did go away for college (which I didn’t) or  did a summer internship in another city (which I did).

What was interesting about the list was that like a goal list I didn’t do almost every single thing on the list, except for maybe two. That didn’t mean that I beat myself up about the two things I did, despite saying I never would do them. Why? Because life has detours.

Most of my life has been planned out carefully. I went to college and graduated in 4.5 years. I got a job in my profession right out of college, paying me a good salary for my age. But then the unexpected happened and my life took an interesting detour.

My sister was diagnosed with acute leukemia at the age of forty-one. She started chemotherapy treatment, but then things went terribly wrong. After her last chemotherapy treatment she had extreme neurological damage that left her bedridden. She was in the hospital for months, was sent to rehab for more months, acquired meningitis while in the rehab hospital and never recovered completely from the neurological damage. She was left without the ability to walk, to speak or the use of her hands. She died eleven months after being diagnosed at the age of forty-two. She was only three years older than I am now.

When my sister was diagnosed I was twenty-four years old and had been working for a major metropolitan newspaper in advertising. Suddenly I questioned my life and my choices. I felt like I had gone straight into a Corporate American job right out of college, because that’s what I had always thought I should do. Now that I was there I wasn’t too sure if that’s where I wanted to be.  It also didn’t help that my boss was a butt.  So the decision to leave was easy. My life took a detour.

I wanted to start over. I wanted to make a difference. I didn’t want to be forty-one, diagnosed with cancer and questioning my life. I didn’t want to have any regrets. So I quit my job and I started an adventure that lasted four years.

In the four years that I was away I worked in PR for our local Six Flags park, I was a substitute teacher in  elementary schools, I spent a month in Spain totally poor and literally counting my money every day, I was the Ad Manager for a college paper, I met my husband, I applied to and was accepted into graduate school and I got married. I had a very “inexpensive” wedding because I was so poor. It was an adventure and it was a great detour.

Four years later I returned to the same newspaper and I have had an interesting ten years since I returned. I’ve held many positions and I had my two children along the way. I don’t think I could have worked for a better company when having my children and maternity leave. I was able to stay home with my daughter for two months and with my son for three months with full pay, based on my seniority.

As I celebrate my ten year anniversary this November with my company (and twelve years total if you count the first two years) I think about my life and the detours it took to get where I am now. I also know that at thirty-eight this isn’t it. (Remember my sister was forty-one when she was diagnosed with cancer.) But I can really say that I have done a lot in my thirty-eight years. I know that life will take several more detours along the way and frankly, I’m ready for them.